Monday, January 26, 2004

About Me

Bloggers often have a little link entitled ‘About Me’ or some such that leads you to a page where they tell you 100 remarkable, interesting, or little known facts about themselves. I suddenly thought I could spend the afternoon doing that instead of working, but immediately ran into a big problem – I could hardly think of 5 things about me, let alone 100 :-

1) I can speak in public without notes
2) I can spot the constellation of Orion
3) I can draw you a ray diagram explaining what causes rainbows
4) I have had chicken pox twice
5) I can make sushi
6) I can throw a pretty decent pot on a good day

And that took me about 2 hours to come up with. Looked at like that it doesn’t seem I’ve been doing much with my time does it?

Perve

Bad Bunni was blogging about how she is grossed out at the thought of her pupils getting hot for her. There is also a quote from Patton Oswald about how everyone has a secret fantasy that is so extreme and degrading that you’re ashamed of yourself for even knowing what it is, let alone having it. Is this true though? I must admit that on the odd occasion I’ve been in bed with someone and they’ve said something along the lines of “Whatever you want to do – we can do it. Whatever your secret fantasy is, let’s do it right now, I don’t care how weird and screwy it is I want to do it with / for you right now” and for a couple of seconds you actually contemplate mentioning The Thing or the Other Thing or OH MY GOD – That Thing. Fortunately this is only ever a second or two, sanity reasserts itself, and you can quickly substitute some sort of reasonable sounding chains / public nudity alternative or whatever.

While I’m fairly sure most people have one or two little scenarios running in their heads that they wouldn’t like to admit to in front of The Vicar do they all keep it a secret? Are otherwise seemingly entirely normal couples indulging each other’s bizarre fetishistic obsessions? When the lights go down at No. 79, Oak Drive, Tunbridge Wells does the candle wax and cheese flan come out? The only time someone ever divulged that kind of information to me I’m afraid to say that I didn’t go through with it for her. It was beyond my capabilities, and frankly a bit terrifying too. Didn’t put me off her though, and should the opportunity have ever presented itself I would probably have considered it, but sheesh – people sure are weird aren’t they ;-)

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