Woo hoo! I just met the guy who fixes the vending machines and he showed me the ‘waste bucket’. I’m totally tripping – it’s medieval. The machine isn’t plumbed in at all – there’s just a bucket underneath a spout which comes from the grille below the cup dispenser. It’s not even covered. It must take months to fill up. Surely this can’t be right.

Bizarrely I want to use the other machine now – even though they are utterly identical and logic dictates that it too must have a bucket.