Why is it only amazon.co.uk that has no listen to facility in the music section. Every other one in the whole wide world does, so why not this one – are UK consumers unusually impulsive or something? It seems unlikely.

I need to get some new music – I'm bored of virtually everything I have. No-one listens to music anymore. Well hardly anyone. The last album that everyone I know bought was FBS – only Dr Heartbreak is reliably going out and spending his cash on new music. Jones, I am reliably informed, has had some kind of mental breakdown music wise and spends his time driving around with the roof down listening to either The Darkness or opera at maximum volume. He is surprised that people (and by people I mean everyone) keep flipping him off. Stev is caught in a Belle & Sebstian warp hole and as for my own listening habits of late . . . sheesh. Suffice it to say I've been listening to a lot of dance music and wondering what ever happened to ROCK!

I seem to have somehow been looking the other way when the whole latest wave of bands happened which is weird cos I love the Strokes & the Kills, but somehow I don’t feel connected with the scene – I don’t feel confident to talk about them like I could about Binary Finery or Deedrah or some other bunch of bedroom lurking sequencer tsars.

So what should I buy to revitalise myself? Tempted as I am to go and but The Essential Billy Bragg this can only be a negative step, surely. The last thing I can remember being really into was Nu-Metal and I don’t mean that in a mallcore, wearing a lot of baggy and refusing to do my homework way (ideally with S-L-I-P K-N-O-T biroed on my knuckles (can’t write with your other hand? – stick to K-O-R-N)) but more of a 'something you can really tap your foot to / jump up and down in a rather juvenile fashion' way . In fact an early returning flatmate once caught me jumping off the arm of the sofa whilst air drumming to to Blink 182's First Date. I was 31. Still – at least I'm younger than Fred Durst. AND ALWAYS WILL BE.

BTW – who the hell are Good Charlotte anyway?

Soundtrack : The Kills – Keep on Your Mean Side