Thursday, April 01, 2004

I'm beginning to think that blogs fall into two main categories :-

1) blogs by people who are happily married / shacked up

2) blogs by people who are bitter twisted loners and will probabl;y remain that way because they are incapable of ever forming proper relationships.

This is fine but at the same time one soemtimes wonders why people who don't smoke, consider two drinks to be 'getting wasted', are strangers to the CCJ and the bailiffs and have wonderful emotionally fulfilling relationships are writing anyway if they're that fucking happy. Nothing depresses me more than the tale of a happy anniversary camping trip with the spouse and a couple of dogs. I want to read about misery and loneliness - the depair of the lone blogger tapping away through the night, eying up that 200 bottle of diazepam and thinking about being eaten by cats.

Tolstoy wrote that all happy families are basically the same but that unhappy ones are all unhappy in their own way, and this basically holds true for bloggers as well. There just seems to be this groundswell of people who's blogs seem to be about telling the worls how happy they are and what a terrific contented couply time they're having. Fortunately these people are easily spotted as the top of the page will always contain some information along the following lines :-

About Me: Happily married for 7 years, no kids, 3 cats, Mr Plunkett, Binky Betsy & Sir Sitsalot
Favourite Memory:When [Insert spouse's name here] first came into that 7-11 when I was buying a slushy and threatened to get the clerk fired because the enchilladas were infected with e-coli.
Best Ever Day:My Wedding day.
etc etc etc

Stop this sort of thing immediately!

What do you think you look like??

Well this is nice isn't it - I'm actually ahsamed of my own levels of self indulgent cumudgeonlyness. I dont actually hate people because they're deliriously happy and can get an erection over the thought of a Argos Catalog - but really:

keep your happy thoughts locked up where they belong - dysfunctional borderline psychotic misanthropes only please

Mood : Cranky

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