What a beautiful day. Sun is shining, birds are tweeting, warm, spring has sprung, even the winos on the streets lying in their own piss look picturesque.

OK – that’s enough of that before I start to vomit, let alone anyone reading this. Today I did 3 things I’ve never done before:-

1) I went to Horsham
2) I saw the Changing of the Guard at Buckingham Palace
3) I went to The Photographer’s Gallery

1) Horsham.

I had an interview this morning and it went very well. Provided they get the contract to do the work (and that’s not guaranteed) it looks like I might be in and back in employ again. Let’s hope so. Anyway I had to treck off down to Horsham to see them, though thank God the job is actually in London. Despite my best efforts by drinking too much and staying up late I was up at 6.45am and made the 8.05 so in plenty of time. Horsham seemed like quite a nice place with a nice park, though I was unable to locate anything resembling a coffee shop which was something of a trial. Having said that I was also unable to locat Horsham Town Centre so it might be my fault rather than theirs.

2) Changing the Guard

Arriving back at Victoria about 11.45 I decided that as it was such a nice day I’d walk down Tha Mall. Coming up on the Palace I heard military marching musice noticed large crowds of toursists and suddenly realised the blokes in red coats and busbees marching about mucst be the Household Guards and they were changing. My thoughts on observing this ridiculous tourist attraction age old tradition were :-

1) God this looks stupid
2) I wish I was a soldier
3) Is everyone here except me Spanish or Japanese
4) Isn’t it great to be British – Johnny Foreigner’s got nothing on this
5) God this looks stupid

It was however a beautiful day – the tourists looked happy, the flowers were in full bloom – I saw one teenage girl having her picture taken (I think they were Americans) with the Palace and flowers and Winged Victory glittering in the sun and Guards in the background by her grandparents and she looked so happy it was genuinely moving – at least one bunch of visitors were having a nice time anyway ;-)

I can’t believe I never saw it before - I’ve lived in London for 16 years. It happens every single day ffs. And speaking of people who've got nothing better to do with their time these guys are, well, basically fucked up. Beyond belief. (work safe)

Anyway I wandered on following the departing band and walked up through St James, popped into Mitsukoshi just to feel weirded out a bit and then went on to the West End where I stumbled across the Photographer’s Gallery.

3) The Photographer’s Gallery

They currently have an excellent exhibition of photos taken in China c 1966-73 covering the period of the Cultural Revolution. Those Colour-Red News Soldiers may look like nice boys but I don’t think you’d really want to meet them, especially if you’re a narco-capitalist crypto petit-bourgeoisie like me. Unfortunately they didn’t have replicas of Mao’s Little Red Book in the shop or else I would have been seriously tempted to buy a copy. I’d love to just put it on the desk at my next interview, make no reference to it and see what happened.

Following that I also popped into Cybercandy where I wanted to buy absolutely everything (including Sadie who kindly sold me a packet of Mini Meiji Chocolate) and also made my bi-annual trip to Forbidden Planet where I also wanted to buy everything - with the exception of the shop assistants. Ack. I especially want the 4 foot high ultra realistic model of Aspen from Fathom. Yours for only £795. No really ;-)

Deep down there's a fanboy in all of us - if only we could let him free, the twisted little deviant :)