Coming to work this morning there were the usual crowds of idiot kids bunging up the trains gabbling away. It makes me wonder if they actually believe the crap they're telling eachother. This, btw, is really about the blokes. I mean the mounds of obvious lies they're telling eachother about what drugs they took and how much they drank, and how they fronted down some other kid, and of course about how much action they're getting and all these chicks that just can't resist them.

They don't seem to show any sign that they think it's anything less than the sacred truth - are they genuinely that gullible - I mean they can't be can they?? Hasn't it occurred to them that if they themselves are making it up then so, mostly, is everyone else? And they are making it up. It's sheer unadulterated teenage fantasy - endless going out getting pissed and fighting plus non stop ladeez action. Sometimes they fight with the Police but get away cos the police is stupid, right, and believe what they is told. Sheesh.

But you're all 17. You attend Hertford Community College and you all live with your Mums. What up?

The girls are, to be honest, better. When it's just them they seem to talk about what their friends said/did, what they siblings said/did, what they plan to do that evening, why such and such a teacher said that to so and so, who tried to chat them up etc etc etc. It's all a bit more factually based.

Of course when they are together all bets are off and it's a non stop screech fest of strutting and hair flicking and 'oy'-ing and shrieking and stealing someone's folder and throwing someone's cap around.

It's actually quite sweet except when I have a hangover. When do you become too old to think that poking someone in the ribs and stealing their coat is a reasonable expression of amorous intent?