Hmmm - Monday afternoon, feeling a tad bilious – not to say dispeptic. Not surprising really considering my somewhat hectic weekend. Actually came home very early on Friday and went to bed at a reasonable hour for once, but that was the only quiet bit.

Went to Travis Perkins on Saturday ‘Where the Trade Shop’ and spent 20 minutes hanging out with geezers ferreting through the paint tins and trying to look like a proper bloke instead of an obvious DIYer. Not helped by being accompanied by Flatmate2 who looks beautiful (if a tad spaced) wherever she goes. No way could she pass for a plumbers mate . . . unlike Ronnie who seemed to fill the role admirably. Spent the afternoon painting the living room while Flatmate1 retired hurt due to a surfeit of elderly parsnips. Got to about 5.30 and gave up – went out to get pissed.

Actually turned into a bit of a spectacular – definitely what Shazzer would refer to as a £100 night. Tapas Bar, Kentish Pie (some sort of band actually) at the Spitz and then finally a nightclub in Mayfair somewhere. We started off with myself and Flatmate1, Dr Heartbreak, teej, Hari, La Caple and a couple of random Kiwis and we all made it to the end except the Antipodeans.

The club was fairly cheesy really and I bumped into Ant from Dial-a-Dog – too random. I think I even got the bus home in the end. Can’t remember much after jumping from one painted square to the other on the dance floor with Flatmate2.

Sunday - did not get up early but – blessed surprise – Flatmate2 had risen from her sick bed and practically finished the painting. Fully recovered – certainly enough to give me a bollocking for messing up her paintbrushes and waking her up at 4am. Honestly – some people. Felt guilty so I cooked a leg of pork as a peace offering and watched The Green Mile whilst fortifying myself with G&Ts and a selection of yummy cigarette treats. But the main gossip of the previous evening – apart from Teej continually nicking cigs off me despite being ‘an ex smoker’ – was that Hari tells me that Lovely Woman has split up with her girlfriend! This puts Hari in a bit of a dilema – should she go for it? Or not? And if yes – how?? Many questions but we have no answers. Perhaps I should call LROS and stick my oar in anyway. Probably a very bad idea but – hey – never stopped me before. Actually I think I might just leave it all well alone. Sense Withnall!